Please, Make Them Stop - #35 Battles - Mirrored

Vermillion. Cheese flan. Quantum Leap. Marjorie. Toenail. Clock face. Grey pube.

So, at this point, someone might care to point out that everything that I wrote there was complete jibberish, and none of the words seemed in anyway connected (unless you believed the stories about the substandard food at the bakery near my student house, that is).

Jibberish is, I'm afraid, the only term that I can come up with for this terrible stain on the history of music. To even release it is an album in the first place is pushing taking the piss to a whole new level in the first place.

I could be nice. I could say it is different, unique or thought-provoking. I won't though, I'll say it's garbage.

It sounds like the result of leaving 30 toddlers in a room filled with things to make sounds with, while one four-year-old sits and pushes every button on a soundboard to a drumbeat. It really is that random, and that unbearable.

I can see why some people would label this as 'interesting', but to me, the complete abandom of structure is just jarring. So much so that this 'fun' album actually makes me unhappy when I listen to it. I've read positive reviews of it all over the web and I just can't figure it out.

If anyone reading this is a fan, please, please get in touch and explain it to me. I fear that, like Wild Beasts before it, I'm probably just not cool enough to understand. In fact, I hope that's the case, as at least it would prove that there is actually something here to understand in the first place.

I think that Atlas went on to be a big dance tune. I'm not convinced. Have a look at it and see what you think. To me, it's just awful. It's a musical equivalent of putting fingers in your ears and shouting 'la la la la la'.

The only redeeming feature that this has is that I'm intrigued as to how they convert this onto the stage. If it's some guy with a laptop playing the tunes, they should be ashamed of themselves. If it is (mostly) done live, then it might be worth going along to see how it comes together.

Until I find out which it is, I'm off to do something a little better with my time. *Fingers go in ears* La la la la la la la la la la la.